| Failure’s Failure
George Sheffer
“Act-but do not seek the fruit of your action.” . . . M. Ghandi
I have been intrigued in recent weeks by a quote from Winston Churchill in which he defines success as . . . “going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm.” That thought has really “rung a bell” for me as I think about our work here at the Dale House. While I would substitute the word disappointment in place of failure (because we never fully know what God may be doing in a kid’s life or what seeds may have been planted), we do experience lots of disappointments as we care for hurting kids. And in order to survive in this environment, we must learn how to experience disappointment, even “failure”, without a loss of enthusiasm.
Just now, as I write this article, we are confronted with several residents who, despite our efforts to stop them, continue to smoke “Black Mamba”, a drug sold legally as incense, but it is stronger than marijuana and often makes them very sick. We are confronted with several young girls who will soon be teen moms and raising fatherless children. We are looking into the possibility that some of our guys have been involved in a recent burglary. Friday I will be visiting a former resident who is in prison for 48 years for shooting a woman in a robbery. The following thoughts have been so important to me through the years in helping me to maintain my enthusiasm in the face of such disappointments.
In his book, The Gospel According to Judas, Ray Henderson states: “We explain the failure of love to produce perfection in others as due to our own imperfect love. But what explanation is there for the failure of Judas when loved by the perfect love of Jesus? Who would question the quality of Jesus’ love? Who would dare to suggest that someone else might have been successful with Judas where Jesus failed? . . . No love is free from the risk of failure, not even the love of God.” (p. 52)
Henri Nouwen writes in Bread for the Journey: “We belong to a generation that wants to see the results of our work. We want to be productive and see with our own eyes what we have made. But that is not the way of God’s Kingdom. Often our witness for God does not lead to tangible results. Jesus himself died as a failure on a cross. There was no success there to be proud of. Still, the fruitfulness of Jesus’ life is beyond any human measure. As faithful witnesses of Jesus, we have to trust that our lives too will be fruitful, even though we cannot see their fruit. The fruit of our lives may be visible only to those who live after us.
What is important is how well we love. God will make our love fruitful, whether we see that fruit or not.”
On the wall of Mother Teresa’s children’s home in Calcutta are the words:
“People are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered. Love them anyway.
If you do good people will accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Do good anyway.
If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway.
Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend your years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway.
People really need help but may attack you if you help them. Help people anyway.
Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.
The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
The people you love may hurt you. Love them anyway.”
These are some thoughts that pass through my mind in times of disappointment and thoughts that our young staff must come to understand. On a brighter note, it is a great encouragement to us this year to have a former resident, Nik Wright, join our staff. Although we have had several female residents return as staff, Nik is the first male to do so, and we are grateful for his presence.
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